Thursday, May 31, 2007

Loved ones

During the Memorial weekend I reminisced about my mom. She requested that balloons be let go at the cemetery after the dedication of her grave. She wrote a letter to us and tucked it into her journal for us to find after she passed away. She said, " I've just gone on to soar like the balloons. I pray our separation shall not be so hard to bear!" I remember watching all the balloons float out of sight. I just kept thinking that she was on a vacation and any day she would walk back into my life. I soon had to come to grips with the fact that I would never physically see her again. I had to go on. I knew she would want me to make the best out of my life. So I try to be a moral person by telling the truth, behaving kindly and justly towards others, and giving to those less fortunate than myself. This keeps me connected to her.

2 comments:

Yellowflwrz said...

I had the same experience with having to come to grips that I'd never see Meagan again in this life. I had believed that with enough faith, I could see her spirit, but that didn't happen either. It was such a final thing to lose her. I like what you wrote here about balloons. Today is Meagan's 8th "Heaven Anniversary" and I'm going to get balloons and let them go.
-Stephanie

Kt said...

I remember feeling like I didn't want to let go of that balloon. I wanted to hold onto it or I'd loose her if I let it go, and when I let go, some of that pain went too. It was like somewhat of an acceptance. Interesting feelings at 12.